It's not often that television beats the Internet to breaking a story. But Late Show With David Letterman had a distinct edge -- Drew Carey was waiting in the wings for his interview when he got the call confirming his new gig as host of The Price is Right.

Drew Carey has always seemed a little... how best to put this... dickish? So it's hard to tell what kind of change this will mean for that most genial of game shows. But perhaps a nice steady daytime gig will be just what he needs to settle down -- and keep his Bergdorf's-bound girlfriend happy.

I just want to hug this man. Not only did he jump down on the track to save a stranger's life, but he clearly doesn’t realize how rare it is for anyone to put themselves in front of an oncoming train. The New York City subway tracks are dangerous enough without a moving train -- think pesticides and the lethal third rail -- but this man jumped off of the platform and rolled a convulsing student into the subway gutter.

What possessed an everyday passenger to do this? As a construction worker whose dangerous job often confines him to small spaces, he says it just had to be done. Not to mention, Wesley didn’t want his little girls to have to see the horror a helpless man get struck down by an oncoming train. Talk about a Super Dad!

This story is so compelling that I actually watched the entire ten-minute clip. My hopes for Wesley’s future are that A) his daughter realize how great of a man their daddy really is B) he recognized by the city is awarded some sponsorship or reward and C) he doesn’t let all of this superhero stuff go to his head.

Who knew a Southie from Boston could a do such an effective Texas Accent? Not me. Last night on Letterman, The Departed star ad-libbed McConaughey’s southern charm and willingness to appear shirtless in some behind-the-scenes commentary. To my knowledge, Damon has never worked on a flick that required him to learn some Texas slang. So this is no pre-packaged Brokeback accent. The man’s got talent. Just admit it.

I know it’s easy to hate Matty Damon -- he's just so damn successful, so recently-married-to-a-beautiful-non-celeb, so seemingly happy. And he is bff's with Affleck, which is never a big seller (just look at Affleck’s box office). But come on… how cute is he? The studly dad deserves some props. Let's take a moment and worship Damon, not because he has fallen into some great ensemble casts (Ocean's 11 and The Departed), but because he knows how to fake a mean twang.

I'm pretty sure this recurring bit on the Letterman Show is executed with the utmost safety, but...

Can you imagine walking to the corner deli, minding your business, only to see something plummet ten stories to the ground? Did I just really see that 300-pound safe fall of a building and onto a car? Or was I too busy listening to my iPod and dodging pedestrian traffic to care?

Well known for his pointless and absurd segments, Letterman has been destroying things in the name of comedy for a while now. His last-laugh humor has lead to the destruction not only safes but a variety of household items, by methods including explosives, steamrollers, and - most frequently - throwing them off the roof of the Ed Sullivan Theater.

What’s next Dave? I really just can’t wait. I’d love to see you throw a snowman off the roof into a pile of presents or maybe a tuba into a vat of Jell-O.